When it comes to new habits, always start with purpose

The 5 Habit P’s and why starting with your purpose helps you embed healthy new habits

Embedding healthy new habits into your daily routine can be hard, but sometimes we make it harder than it needs to be. It’s like buying a bedside table from IKEA, then getting it home, opening the box and finding an instruction manual for a wardrobe… How’s that going to work out for you?

The good news is, that alongside habit stacking, the 5 Habit P’s led by Purpose-led habits complete the only ‘instruction manual’ you need to change your routine to change your life ⛅..

The 5 Habit P’s:

1. Purpose-led habits
2. Process
3. Progress
4. Purposeful practice
5. Patience

When it comes to the 5 Habit P’s, it should come as no surprise that we start with purpose, because at No Moss we love purpose so much that we believe “our purpose is our people’s purpose.”

As our Chief Purpose Officer and Co-Founder Steven says:

“As a company, we are forever working toward being the most purposeful ecosystem in the world. This means that we grow purpose-driven; committed people — in every conversation, skill by skill, interaction by interaction.”

Our own, and our people’s purpose infuses everything we do. Part of my purpose is to teach people how to embed healthy new habits into their daily routine. So, in this article I share why each Habit P is important, and tips on how you can leverage the P’s to make your healthy new habits stick!

Let’s start with Purpose 🎯

Purpose-led habits

“Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.” Victor E. Frankl

Purpose-led habits are powerful habits because they connect you with who you want to become. James Clear, from Atomic Habits fame, calls them identity-based habits. Whatever you call them, because they are connected to your ikigai, your ‘why’, they are easier to start, more enjoyable to finish, and rely less on motivation to develop.

To create purpose-led habits, first, you need to know what your purpose and core values are. Once you know that, you create a few goals and objectives that live under each value. From there you simply align your activities and habits with those goals and objectives (like a simple strategic plan from business)

If at this point you’re saying to yourself; “but I don’t have a purpose”, then come work with us at No Moss and we’ll help you find it (I’m only half joking🤗). If that’s not an option, here is some advice to help you ‘uncover’ your purpose:

Firstly, remember that your purpose does not have to (and probably shouldn’t) be saving the world or launching the “next big thing”. Do not set the bar too high when it comes to your purpose. Stick to a more abstract values-based purpose if you can (which you can). Purpose statements, or what I call Personal Vision Statements (PVS), are about how you want to live, not what you do for a living.

In addition, a PVS usually includes an element of who you’re going to help. For example, your PVS could be: “To support the growth of my family through my contribution, attitude, and actions.” Or: “To empower youth and inspire success through teaching.”

Importantly, with these examples you will notice that where you live, what you do for a job, and how much money you make, does not affect your ability to achieve your PVS. I’m now going to use a hypothetical example of the last PVS above ( empowering youth and inspiring success through teaching), to show how you can create and live your purpose without changing ‘what’ you do, but simply ‘how’ you do it.

Here are 4 ways a dad who works as an accountant, can inspire youth through teaching:

• Mentoring his younger colleagues
• Volunteering to teach and train at a local club/sports team
• Enrolling in a course to learn new skills (learning is one of the best ways of teaching)
• Inspiring his own kids through his actions and growth mindset (as a dad myself, I know that last one might just be the hardest!)

So, there are 4 relatively easy ways that an ‘accountant by day’ can inspire and empower youth.

By the way, I am spending more time on this P, because purpose is so important to us here at No Moss. It’s the reason we get up in the morning! From a personal point of view, having misunderstood what purpose is myself for most of my life, I realise that there are many people out there who still misunderstand what living with purpose and purpose-led habits actually are. Which means that often they don’t even start looking for their own purpose. So, I’ll finish with an example from my own life, which hopefully will give a few of you a nudge…

I am living with more purpose and less stress today because I now realise that part of my purpose is simply being a good dad. I am now parenting better (by no means perfect, but better!), because I have discovered that like many parents that one of my core values is to “put my family above all else” 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦. So, how does knowing this core value reduce my stress levels and give me more energy (kids give you so much energy)?

Simply put, I use this core value as a “prioritisation and perspective tool”, which is how a PVS and core values should be used. Understanding — and reminding myself every day — that putting my family first is one of my five core values, helps me prioritise where I spend my time and energy. I find that more often than not I am using this tool in the “juggle of managing work and family”. Or is that “jungle”?

Therefore, when work pressures pile up, I remind myself of this core value and it helps to put those stressors into perspective. It helps me focus and prioritise. Does it work all the time? No. Do I get it right all the time? Sh#t no, just ask my kids…

But what I know for a fact is that by simply reminding myself of this core value, I am parenting better than when I didn’t know it was a core value. And that in and of itself, helps me manage my stress levels better.

Process

“It’s only when you make the process the goal that the big dream can follow.” — Oprah Winfrey

Speaking of focus, by focusing on creating the right process, system and environment, you achieve more in a shorter time frame. If you focus on today and your processes, rather than the end game (Open Goals help here), you will be more successful in achieving those goals. Importantly don’t forget to be flexible, agile, and have fun as you practice putting your new purpose-led habits into place.

Focusing on processes rather than goals is a super-simple stress reduction technique, but not always easy. When people create SMART (Specific Measurable Attainable Relevant Time-specific) future-focused goals, too many times they stress themselves out and become anxious about the gap between the goal they’re aiming for (the SMART future-focused goal that they don’t have full control over) and where they are today.

The ‘trick’ is to focus on the present process. Focus on improving the daily actions and activities that you have full control over, because then you will perform better. In nearly every case, focusing on process will mean that you have a better chance of achieving your future-focused goal. Rather than wasting precious energy and effort stressing out about the future.

Progress

“Slow progress is better than no progress.” — Unknown

Speaking of goals, remember to focus on and celebrate achieving smaller milestones, as you work towards your Big Hairy Audacious Goal (BHAG). In this case, by using a strategic staircase planning model, and rewarding your progress as you achieve short-term milestones, you stay motivated for longer.

If you’ve already got a few purpose-led habits ‘stacked’ together to embed into your daily routine, then I recommend that each time you finish one of your new habits, take a moment to genuinely celebrate. These are what BJ Fogg, from Tiny Habits fame, calls Celebration Moments. Each Celebration Moment gives your brain a burst of dopamine, which makes you and your brain feel good (feeling good helps new habits stick). That ‘feel good factor’ becomes the reward in your habit loop(1) and helps to strengthen the new connection between neurons in your brain. Which is what scientists call neural plasticity.

(1) Charles Duhigg is a Pulitzer Prize-winning author who wrote; The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business. His habit loop is a concept explaining exactly that with 3 simple elements: 1] Cue (trigger), 2] Routine (habit), and 3] Reward (celebration moment).

Practice

“If you don’t practice you don’t deserve to win.” — Andre Agassi

As the old saying goes; “practice makes progress”. Most if not all world-class performers have got where they are today by how they practice, and the hours they spend doing it. Sure talent and skill get you part of the way, however, it’s your effort and how you make that effort that really counts!

If you want to be a world-class performer you need to learn how to practice deliberately*, for the rest of us, purposeful practice* is the best way to improve.

Purposeful practice in a nutshell:

1. Link effort to intent (purpose-led habits are an important part of the link)
2. Plan (create stretch goals then break them apart, include feedback loops, and celebrate success)
3. Commit (accountability partners help you stick to your commitments)
4. Rest, Recover, and Celebrate (purposeful practice is hard so make sure you take a break and reward yourself)

Part of purposeful practice is creating feedback. When practising anything you should create “feedback loops”. At a high-level this is so you can review what is working and what is not, and then adjust your practice regime accordingly. One of the simplest feedback loops you can create is keeping a practice journal (paper or electronic. At the end of each practice session note down what worked well, and not so well. For your next practice session, start by focusing on the “not so well”.

* Anders Ericsson is a world renowned expert on what makes champions become champions. He coined the phrase “deliberate practice”, and has spent decades understanding how people practise effectively. If you want to become a World Champion, then I recommend you read up on Anders’ work and start practising deliberately. However, if you want to just get better at getting better, “purposeful practice’’ will get you there. You can find out more about deliberate practice and Ander’s fantastic work here: Findingmastery

Patience

“Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting.” — Joyce Meyer

It’s now time for a reality check. Once you’ve debunked the 4 Habit Myths and taken the first 4 Ps into account, you’re in a fantastic position to set yourself up for success. But, let’s face it, some change isn’t easy and takes time (no matter how many “secret” habit hacks you’ve learned). Often good things take time, and this is where patience comes into play.

So, work the plan, but while you’re working the plan, practice patience (it’s a virtue you know).

Finally, remember that to give yourself the best chance of success (patience or not), always start with Purpose. Then, develop a realistic Practice regime focusing on the Process, and Progress. Then, before you know it your Patience will have paid off and you’ll be a new you!

That’s the 5 Habit P’s done and dusted. If you’d like to find out more about our purpose here at No Moss check our Culture Book.

Originally published at https://nomoss.co by Gareth Robinson on March 10, 2022.